Kenneth and I haven’t always imagined our lives with kids. We had gone back and forth so many times, but December 2012 we decided through prayer and faith that this was the path we wanted to take. To our surprise we became pregnant February 16th, 2013. Towards the end of the February I was feeling off, but just thought it was from being so sleepy, but on the morning of March 2nd I had a gut feeling. I took a pregnancy test and within seconds it showed we were pregnant. I went upstairs and woke Kenneth up; he thought I was lying, until he saw the test. We sat on the edge of the bed thrilled, yet so scared of not being the best parents. Our pregnancy was beautiful! No morning sickness, no food aversions, just me growing a beautiful baby inside! We felt so lucky to be bringing a child into this world. Every night I would pray over him and tell him how much I love him. At the first ultrasound he was so tiny, and the second we felt like he grew so much! He didn’t like to be pressed on with the Doppler and would hit it. We couldn’t believe our eyes! June 1st, we found out it was boy. Kenneth couldn’t be more proud of his son, and my heart grew a million times! What we didn’t know is within a month our proudest moment would turn to be our darkest moment. On July 1st, I had my regular doctor’s appointment and everything was great! We got to see him, but due to her machine it wasn’t the greatest ultrasound. She gave us orders for our anatomy scan and sent us on our way! The morning of July 2nd I went to work and make our anatomy scan appointment. I called Kenneth so excited, we were going to get to see him again! By noon I was feeling a little achy, but just thought it was because he was hitting a growth spurt. At 3:30pm I went to the restroom because the achy was a little more intense and had one little pain. When I wiped I had green discharge with a little bit of blood. I immediately knew something wasn’t right and had Kenneth rush me to the hospital, just thinking it was a severe kidney infection, not prepared at all for what it actually was. The nurse came in and checked me, and said I was 3cm dilated, 100% effaced, and my water bag was bulging through. They immediately admitted me and started magnesium to stop any contractions just in case and Indocin to try and bring my water bag up. I was on very strict bed rest, not able to get up to even use the restroom. They also had my bed slanted with my head down to relieve the pressure on my cervix. I spent three days on the magnesium, but due to it causing severe stress on my body, the doctor stopped it. I was then started on Procardia for contractions. On July 8th, they attempted to do a transvaginal cerclage. Kenneth and I were praying so hard that my water bag had gone up and they would be able to do the cerclage, and I would just be on hospital bed rest until 30+ weeks. I knew this was going to happen, we felt that this was going to work. After 10 minutes in the operating room, the doctor looked at us and said there was nothing he could do. I had dilated to 9cm… We didn’t understand that after all the medication that this could happen, that I didn’t have any contractions, and that we had prayed. They wheeled me back into my room, and I laid their heartbroken. We were told that they would be surprised if I was pregnant in the morning. The next morning I was pregnant! My hope came back, I could do this, and I could keep him in and safe! That night I was still pregnant, my optimism grew, I was going to carry full term on hospital bed rest! Then on Wednesday morning as I fell back asleep, a huge gush of fluid happened. I had the nurses testing for amniotic fluid so many times during my stay, but they had always come back negative. I was hoping I had just peed myself, I had no feeling in my bladder after having a catheter in for so long, but in my heart I knew it wasn’t. My water broke at 10:30am… I was in so much shock that this was the end that I was going to have to deliver him. He had a heartbeat and was perfectly healthy right before, that it was my body that was failing him. Kenneth and I met with the NICU doctors on what to expect. Kenneth and I believed that he was going to come out okay. I prayed for that, I longed for that, I needed that. On July 10th, 2013 at 7:25pm I gave birth to our beautiful sleeping son, Glenn Gerron Castillo. The quiet in the room was so loud and broke me. I wanted to hear him cry. But the NICU doctor said he wasn’t breathing and didn’t know how long he had been gone. We decided to make the painful decision to not have them try and resuscitate him. We knew in hearts that he was gone from the world. Glenn, was taken from this world due to an incompetent cervix. My cervix is not able to support the weight of a baby and begins to open, without warning, without contractions. Our son should be here, we should be preparing to bring him home, and instead we are here trying to pick up the pieces of our life. Glenn is going to change the world and save lives through me. Glenn’s memory will live on.